He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Randomize
