I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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