Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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