lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
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my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can vaginas get frostbite?
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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