If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Randomize