well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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