What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
