I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
