Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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