He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
