Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
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