she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize
