There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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