Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"