Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."

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(703): View more from Virginia

I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

what? who is this?

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(317): View more from Indiana

I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.

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23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
Read it at the TFLN blog
(307): View more from Wyoming

Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.

(307): View more from Wyoming

Except even better, boobs get discounts.

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?

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(307): View more from Wyoming

The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.

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(712): View more from Iowa

Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.

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(504): View more from Louisiana

So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"

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