who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS