Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Randomize