She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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