Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
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