just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize