i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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