brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
