stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
