you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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