Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I woke up under a house in Key West
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