I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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