Can i not drive my cunt home
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
