I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
