is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
