I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I think I have vodka in my lungs
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
