I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
