This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I should be sponsored by Trojan
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
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