drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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