The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
