I must be too annoying 4 u.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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