My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
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