THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
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I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize