At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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