Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
