Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize