I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
