My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
