3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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