Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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