Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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