She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
