how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
