Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
