Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I just made out with a guy for $7.
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
