I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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