i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
