Jerry, you need to find god
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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