Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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