I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize